Saturday, May 31, 2008

Toys from found items

Playing with spoons
This is Ava playing with plastic spoons.

Baby wearing H's shoes
This is Ava playing with H's shoes.

My godson


This is my godson in October of 2004.


This is him today. When did he become such a little man?

Collard Greens

Collard Greens
These are the collard greens we harvested from our garden. We had them for dinner. They were delish!

Ho Ho Homer

Just now, these crazy Christians ladies were at the door offering us Bible literature. Yohboh told them he did not want any. He was wearing only his Ho Ho Homer red and white boxers.

You know those little Christian ladies were totally checking out his Homer......

Friday, May 30, 2008

This evening's menu

This evening's menu is organic pizza, cherry tomatoes, freshly sliced cantaloupe and Cheerios on the side.


The Cheerios are delicious!


My compliments to the chef!

Lostpedia

I used to watch Lost. I like JJ Abrams. But it got too confusing. Then I found Lostpedia. I guess I would read to catch up, but I did not like it when the little hobbit guy died.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Ava Dances

Another installment of the baby dancing. This time to Outkast.

Ava still grumptious

Ava is still a bit off. I suspect she misses her daddy.

We went to visit Yohboh today at his work. We have to ride an elevator to get to his floor. Ava is TERRIFIED of elevators. We got into the elevator with another lady and Ava starts SCREAMING. The woman looks at me accusingly. I say she is afraid of elevators. We get off and she is fine. What I though was interesting was the accusing look I got because my baby is afraid of something. Sometimes, babies cry.


I just read some Douglas Adams.


He says, "Never forget your towel!"


That is some good advice.


This is the pile of blankets I have next to Ava's crib. Yes I know it is almost June. Yes I know that it is crazy to have this many blankets. But you should see the stack yohboh put away.

Catbus for sale

If you did not see My Neighbor Totoro, then you would not get this.

I could never ride on a catbus, I would sneeze too much!

What makes a woman a woman

I have been thinking lately about what makes a woman. From all the controversy regarding the Miley Cyrus Vanity Fair pictures, I think a lot of girls now think that being sexy is being womanly. I hate to be the one to bring this news to your attention girls, but being sexy is being female. Miley, men want to fuck you. Men (not all, certain men) will want to fuck you for the rest of your life. Don't believe me? Look around the internet. There is EVERY kind of porn imaginable. Granny porn, pregnant porn, even furniture porn. So don't confuse being fuckable with adulthood. Adulthood is being able to say, I fucked up and I am taking responsibility for my fuck up. Being an adult is recognizing that you are responsible for you and your actions. No one else is to blame.

Also, girls it is more important to be SMART more than sexy or pretty. Because if you are SMART, you can be RICH and then you can buy pretty. And girls are pretty much always sexy.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

One thing made Ava happy today

Ava fed herself with a spoon. She has been gnawing on the spoon when I put it on her mouth. I was reluctant to let her do this because of the mess it would make.

Looks like I am going to be dealing with a lot of messes.....

Grouchy Bean of Butter

Ava was not her normal happy go lucky self. I think she told my mom to Shut Up. I think that is a yohboh thing. My mom actually said Sheekoolaw, which means loud to my kid.


Flipping through the Avon catalog (who buys Avon anymore?)


Avon SUCKS!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Ava one year and a day ago


This is Ava one year and a day ago with her Daddy.

Bye

So Ava, Yohboh and I went to dinner with MIL. Ava was good through dinner. After dinner, we went to the bakery next door to get Boba. Ava got bored and said Bye, to indicate she was ready to leave.

HOW CUTE IS THAT?


I am CUTE!


This is me and my Daddy. Daddy is doing Blue Steel.

Random Coolness

Are they shoes or feet?

Coffee art and some amazing cakes!

A gold urinal for women!

Mile Envy

Sessoms blogged about the fact at one point in our many email exchanges, he had mile envy.

I have a few responses:
1) You could not have handled the Korean sisters if anything kinky happened. Fess up.
2) Who is your mile patron? Out him on the internet!
3) Glad you are going to be there! This is going to be fun!

Monday, May 26, 2008

Fruiting Mulberry Tree

So yesterday, Yohboh found a tree with blackberries on it at Durty's house. Now, I know that blackberries come from a bush so I had to look it up. I think it is a fruiting mulberry tree.

Here are two photos of the tree in question:




Bad Mama

Yesterday was a lot of fun. We did a lot of things that we do not normally do with a baby. It's not that we went out of the way not to do them, it's just that these happenstances just haven't occurred.

I was a bad mama yesterday. Ava was wandering over at Chuck's house. We were going to eat dinner when I pulled out a leaf in the table. Ava had gotten used to the dimensions of the table before the leaf so THONK! Her little head met the corner. Much howling and now she is sporting quite a little knot on her forehead.

Being a mother to me means that it does not matter the million times I have prevented her from getting a knot, but NEVER forgetting the one time I did not.


Eating a quesadilla.


It's GOOD!


SUPER GOOD!

The scents of summer

This is what summer smells like to me:

Coppertone drying on warm skin
Chlorinated water
Smoke from a barbecue
Bug repellent
Yeasty smell of beer
Roasted Peanuts at a baseball game
Faint sweet odor of sweat
Antiseptic cool breeze of air conditioning
Fresh mowed grass

These were the smells of my weekend. It was a good one. How was yours?

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Braves Game

Ava went to a Braves game today. It was her first one. She got too much sun. Then we went to DBW's house and had dinner. IT ONLY TOOK TWO AND A HALF YEARS!


In her Braves outfit.


The first time in an expedition.


At the game.


With Mama.


Cranky.



Asleep


Looks very brokeback to me...


Passed out in the car


The Braves are COOL!


DBW got some sun.

I wish

I wish I had known about this tuxedo before I was married. I would have made yohboh wear it.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Pool Party Goodness

Today was a day of pool party, smoked hog and lots of sunshine.


Ava on her way!


Such cuteness!


Little lady!


In the pool!


With Grandma


Hunh!


Then I said!


Throne


Marty and Baby


Smoked Hog

Books I read that I do not recommend

I read the Insatiable Critic by Gael Greene. It was a food memoir, or it was supposed to be. She is a restaurant critic but, she also fucked Elvis and Clint Eastwood. I looked at her picture to see what kind of woman fucks The King and Dirty Harry and she looks like my friend's mom who is an accountant. Now I have a visual of her going at it with fat Elvis and Dirty Harry. (SHUDDER).

The other one I read was Eating My Words by Mimi Sheraton. She just sounded like a pompous ass. I was hoping to get some insight into how it is to be a writer and a well respected one at that but no, who goes on and on about stuff that seemed unrelated to her memoir.

Friday, May 23, 2008

The Best Toys

As a new parent, you get a lot of educational toys. But you know what the best toys are? The shit you have just laying about in your house.



Baby LOVES these paper cups!


The world is my playground.

She loves under this table.

Culinary Magic

I made mayonnaise.

Many people had been going on and on about it.

Even Top Chef had them do it in their meez competition.

So I did it.

It was easy.

One egg yolk, juice of one lemon, pinch of salt, squirt of Dijon mustard, 3/4 cup of oil and you too can make culinary magic. It took six minutes of whisking.

That being said, I also bought a large jar of Hellman's today. Because I am all for culinary magic, but I am also a woman who believes in convenience.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

All this cuteness and beauty

Sometimes, I am shocked at how cute my kid is.


I like to hold cups.


I like to hold my foot.


What's behind here?

Infomercials

I think this is the third time I have discussed informercials. Here are a few of my favorites:

Shamwow: It holds 21 times its weight in liquid. I like the guy wearing the mike like they do at the Gap. And what is with his mohawk.

Keepeez: Just press and it's sealed! The buzzword is VACUUM SEALED.

Pancake Puffs: I like the "specially designed" flipping sticks. Wouldn't chop sticks do?

LOVE THESE

These photos made me chuckle.

I really like the bread sandal.

Mundane Dreams

So yesterday I dreamt I got up, changed the baby's diaper, fed her and let the dog out.

Then I woke up and did EXACTLY those things.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Happy Birthday Emo

So tomorrow is Stinky's birthday. She will be 33. I thought it would be cute to get Ava holding a sign saying so. BUT HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO GET A TODDLER TO STAND STILL AND HOLD A SIGN SO THAT THE CAMERA CAN READ IT LEGIBLY? It is like, really hard. Here are five attempts:














Happy Birthday Stinky. Ava, Minjenah, and Yohboh love you.