Monday, March 31, 2008

Bean Bag Chair

Since Ava enjoyed sitting in her bouncy seat so much, I got her a bean bag chair. I think she enjoys it.

Getting ma lean on.

Ava mugging for the camera.

Ava just grabbed the dog's tail.


It is so easy to blame a mother for the child.

It is also very frustrating.

Why aren't fathers blamed as well?

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Coconut Bread

So over Easter, I made this recipe. It was good, but I wanted to change it up. So instead of milk, I used Coco Lopez and used 1 stick of butter instead of the 6 tablespoons. It was better but too sweet.

Study in Red

You cannot tell this, but both Ava and Yohboh are wearing red pants.


In the last 24 hours, Lola has pooped in the house, peed in the house and gotten off her lead (WTF).

She is being very exasperating.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Ava lent some of her stuff out

Friends of ours are going to have a baby this summer. I lent out some of Ava's stuff that she had outgrown. It was barely used.

I don't need the baby stuff!

Baby Stuff! I AM A BIG GIRL!

But I do like this chair.

It is very lounge-y. Look at me at my languid peak.

Third time is the charm

Ava handed me a diaper when she pooped. I would not make a big deal of this but this is the THIRD time she has done so. The other two times were with her grandmothers (Don't get me started on competitive grandmothering) so I guess it is time for me to get a potty. At least we can get her started on number twos.

My new fashion magazine

I am a big magazine reader. It is my thing. I like to read and keep up to date on the useless. I used to read fashion magazines because they were interesting.

Here are the latest headlines from Glamour:
30 Things to do to put you in a good mood
99 ways to look sexier this summer
25 best summer does and don'ts

Here is on what Parents Magazine says:
Why polite Children get Ahead
How smart is your baby?
The FUN list 44 things to do right now.

Parenting magazines are my new fashion magazine. Instead of feeling bad that my body is not shaped like a praying mantis, I can be upset that I do not know how to do the safest things for my baby.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Busy Day

Ava figured out how to open doors and apparently walked on a pool cover at Grandma's house.

No wonder she is exhausted

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Ava pushes buttons on the TV

Cheeky E. makes an appearance at then end.

Ava watches TV

Ava likes the DVD player's screen saver.

Ava on the futon a year ago

If she had been mobile, I think she would have fit in that armrest hole back then.


Ava did this to herself THREE times. She slid between the futon and the armrest. I discouraged her but of course she wanted to do it more. She cried when she realized she could not get her head in. I quickly rescued her two times. This is the third time. I took photos then rescued her. Oddly, she did not do it again.

I am stuck!



Yohboh Photos

Apparently Yohboh took this photo of Ted Allen.

He also works as a photographer in Philly, takes photos of cars and also takes pictures in Sydney.

I am an evil woman

My mother is a very conservative traditional Asian woman. She likes to laugh without showing her teeth because the showing of teeth is considered vulgar. She has always discouraged me from being my brash loud self.

Today, I showed her how Ava likes to dance with FloRida's Low.

My mother totally danced with her grandbaby.

These are some of the lyrics my mother rocked out to:

That's what I told her, her legs on my shoulder
I knew it was ova, that Henny and Cola
Got me like a Soldier
She ready for Rover, I couldn't control her
So lucky oo me, I was just like a clover
Shorty was hot like a toaster
Sorry but I had to fold her,
Like a pornography poster
She showed her

I am an evil woman

My daughter and my dog

Lola is very good with the baby.

My mother would like the dog to not exist. She would especially like it if the dog did not touch the baby.

My mother will pick the baby up so that she will not touch my dog.

Little does she know that Ava eats Lola's fur.

Sack of Shit

So the other day, Ava pooped. Ava's poops have become very human. Very much like mine so they are really stinky.

What I like to do with her poopy diaper is detailed here.

Yohboh changed this poopy diaper. He is very good at that and he is wonderful about it. He however left the plastic baggie in Ava's room.

I was getting the baby ready for bed when he called out, "Is there a sack of shit still in there?"

We both recognized that this was the first time we had ever spoken of the literal sack of shit. We all have spoken of the figurative sack of shit, but when has anybody spoken of a real live sack of shit?

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Ava's first picture

We had to expand the Baby Zone. Ava is always moving and containing her in the TV room was not enough. Now she has her room and the hallway.

Always moving.

Who me?

This is Ava's first drawing. I made the bold large stroke at the top. Ava did the rest. PICASSO WATCH OUT!

Don't you hate it when

Don't you hate it when you are talking to someone about how frustrating something is for you and then they start talking about how frustrating it is for them or better yet someone who you don't even fucking know?

There are two types of conversationalists:
Ones who listen
Ones who wait for the silent parts to talk.

Who was I speaking with?

Who do you think you are?

So my mother came over and moved some stuff in my house.

I completely lost my shit.

She moved everything back.

Do you think she does this to her friends?

Or only I get this special treatment?

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Hello Kitty Marshmallow

This is a Hello Kitty Marshmallow.

Can you believe Mama eats shit like this?

I would not!

The evolution of the Pube

This link is fascinating.

Not only the pubes but the boobs.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Dear Spring

Dear Spring,

Hurry Up and get here. Stay as long as you like.



Ava did the cutest thing

She brushed her hair and then my hair.

I love this kid.

It took thirteen months and ten days

It took thirteen months and ten days for Ava to figure out there are DVD's in our entertainment center.

Teardrops on My Guitar

I really don't listen to popular music. I have never heard a Hannah Montana song. While in the car I heard this song: Teardrops on my guitar.

I burst out laughing. This lyric:
So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

(I recommend a vibrator)

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.

(Fuck Drew. You play the guitar. Woman LOVE men who play guitar, men love women who do so. And if Drew is so stupid, he does not deserve your tears. Also, grab a pair and tell him how you feel.)

I will not say I have lofty musical taste by any means. I own Christina Aguilera CD's for heaven's sake. But that song had me laughing at its bs.

Big sign we are in a recession

So I am at Target getting deeply discounted Easter candy (Durty, come on ovah!), when I am approached in the parking lot by a woman who claims to be in "a hard way". Did I mention the woman was driving a Lexus?

Ava's Superpower

Ava's superpower is to render people unconscious. Her falling asleep is the trigger. Today, Ava put a hurt on Yohboh and myself for three hours.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Pictures of Easter

Ava in her Easter dress Grandma bought for her.

This is Ava's second cousin once removed. Ava's great grandmother and the child's great great grandmother are the same person. Yeah, you are looking at two different generations. They were just born six months apart.

Ava actually liked this dress.

I have spent only half an hour shuddering

Many know that I find my husband's extended family distasteful.

There is only one big thing:
The fifteen year old who has a seven month old is pregnant again. This time she is having it "taken care of" because she knows how challenging having a baby is.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Happy Easter

Easter last year.

Easter this year.

We will be going to Crackerville tomorrow. Perhaps the fifteen year old has worked her way up to a four way. I doubt it though, no one in that family has any fucking ambition.

Six Years Ago

Six years ago today, I watched my godson be born. He was a pale little baby.

Happy Birthday little guy. You are one year closer to manhood.

This is from my wedding. He looked so cute in his Ralph Lauren Tux.

Date Night

Yohboh and I had a lovely date night.

We went to see Chris Rock. HILARIOUS! I laughed so hard my sides ache. Before, we had dinner at Roy's. I think Roy's is one of the best restaurants in Atlanta. I love their Chocolate Molten Souffle. It is so good Yohboh admits that is is worth it.

Ava went to Grandma's. She has even charmed Marty. He loves her as well.

Yohboh on his street.

Ava looking perfect sleeping.

Daddy and Ava chilled out watching TV.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Ava went to the beach

I like the beach.

The beach is a good place for me to get ma drink on. Ma water drink.

Yohboh did not know

Yohboh did not know he married Horatio Sanz

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Hello Internet I am back

Hello Internet I am back. Did you miss me?

It was a lovely vacation. There were many firsts:

Ava's first trip to Orlando
Ava's first time to the beach
Ava's first time to Disney World
Ava's first meeting of Mickey Mouse
Ava's first time on a boat
Ava's first time on a tram
Ava's first time to Publix
Ava's first time riding forward in a car
Yohboh's first trip to Disney World
Yohboh's first time on Tower of Terror

I have tons of pictures but right now, I am tired so you will see more tommorrow. But tonight, I leave you with this:

My two big loves.

Ava walks very well.

Friday, March 14, 2008


This video made me cry.

Taking a Break

Dear Interwebby good ness,

I am taking a break to go to Florida. I know you will miss me so I present you with this:

That is Ava dancing to Flo Rida's Low.

I am too cute!



For me and Yohboh



Thanks Stinky


Yohboh and I were discussing how slim Ava really is since she has been moving so much. We can't really tell during the winter because I have a problem-overdressing the baby.


Thursday, March 13, 2008

Daylight Savings Time

I really don't care for it. Why not stay on it all the time?

Has my sense of humor changed?

Because this is really funny. Before I became a parent, not so much.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Ava walks in red shoes

I like my red shoes.

I'm walking and talking!

Walking and talking.


Ava sitting in the grass.

Daddy is helping me walk.

I am crying because I am being denied neh neh.

Just because I bit mommy, I don't get neh neh. That is so mean! I NEED NEH NEH!

This Map

This map is completely useless but really funny.

254 - Ludacris’ Rap Map of US Area Codes

More on the poop

My sister sent me this article.

Poop is cutting edge!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

What I had for dinner

I know no one cares what I had for dinner but I wanted to discuss the use of leftovers. I have a problem that I tend to overbuy and overcook food. As a result, we always have leftovers. This is not always a bad thing. For instance, spaghetti sauce is always used up because Yohboh loves his spaghetti. However, sometimes you don't want to eat the same thing for three four days and noodle bowls are a good way to use up odd bits and ends. This particular noodle bowl is some leftover barbecue pork, scallions, cilantro, mushrooms and one Sapporo Ichiban Ramen Noodle package (The red one only- I have NEVER eaten any other color). The broth is the packet from the ramen noodles with some extra chicken base as well as some ginger and garlic thrown in. I have also thrown in many different kinds of protein (chicken, shrimp, tofu, beef, fish) and any veggies. Also I have put a beaten egg in the broth for a egg drop soup effect or put in some frozen dumplings if the mood strikes. There really is no set recipe.

Yohboh liked this a lot. In fact, he even drank all the broth. Also, that fork is mine. Sometimes, I just don't care for chopsticks.

My mama likes to cook!

Ha Ha

So I found this where it shows drunk passed out men. In awkward positions.

That Damn Dog

Lola took three huge dumps in the house.

She will stay outside for the rest of the day.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Snack Trap

This is a snack trap. It is designed so babies don't make messes.

Mommy is really quite silly.

I can't make messes? That is what I do!

Don't make me smack you!

Why would you want me to NOT make a mess with my snacks?

Messes are fun.

I think she looks particularly angelic here.