Monday, December 31, 2007

Ava ran errands


Waiting to get my hair done


WHAT IS THIS THING?


Ohh, a trumpet

Still Playing with the Camera


Where is the Sippy?


I can't find my sippy


Daddy giving Mama the finger

My Brave Little Soldier

I was making lobster bisque for tonight yesterday. I was using the immersion blender and I had Ava in her high chair nibbling on Cheerios. I had an inkling that the blender would bother her. I was doing my sing song voice to her as I blended. I looked at her after I was done and she was struggling not to cry with her face all red and these big fat tears rolling down her cheeks and her lower lip sticking out.

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Something I promised myself I would never do

I really did not want Ava watching any TV.

I was raised on TV. My parents pretty much ignored my sister and I and let us watch TV until Dad read an article in US NEWS and WORLD REPORTS (the most boring magazine EVER) that TV was bad for you. Then we were not allowed to watch any TV at all. My father was forever reading magazine articles and making crazy declarations like that. He would not let us have any sugar for a few years. THAT was fucking annoying.

But since the wonderful separation anxiety phase, if I put Boobah or Teletubbies on, I get half an hour to DO something. Which is why I am updating the blog. More fun than vacuuming. Less soul sucking.

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Colloquialisms

Colloquialisms:

No good deed goes unpunished.

Do more, say less.

Talk is cheap.

Actions mean a fuckload more than words.

Every kindness deserves a proverbial slap.

One good thing about the new camera

One good thing about the new camera is that when I press the button, IT TAKES THE PHOTO. No pause.

NIIIIIICE.


Hey, I am cheeky!


Hells Ya! That is my rap name Cheeky Motherfockin E.


I own this joint.


This is how I roll! In ma yalla duck!

Acquiesce

Acquiesce-according to dictionary.com-–verb (used without object), -esced, -esc·ing.
to assent tacitly; submit or comply silently or without protest; agree; consent: to acquiesce halfheartedly in a business plan.


Don't bother doing this. Then you become a doormat.

Then you get bitched for shit that is not yours. Because if you are a doormat, you get all the shit.

So in the end, be like a man--piss all over everything, someone else will clean it up. Most likely the doormat.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Played with the new camera

I talked to my sister today and she told me to try to take photos without the flash.

With the flash.


Sleepy, mama


SCCCCRUNCH

Without the flash:

Elle est jolie.


How can you not love this face?

Twice Baked Potatoes

So for Christmas dinner, I made twice baked potatoes.

For a dinner of six people, I made twelve.

Why?

Because people fucking love twice baked potatoes.

DUH

There were no leftover potatoes.

Cranky

Did you know that Halliburton stock went up 3000% in 2007?

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Pig in a Box



Christmas

Pig in a Box

Hanukkah

Pig in a Box

Kwanzaa

Pig in a Box

Generous Stinky

My sister got a new SLR so I got her old SLR.

Compare these photos:






Can you tell the SLR?

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

French Canadian

Minjenah: Is that guy gay?

Yohboh: No, he is French Canadian.

Major Milestone


I almost did not take a picture of Ava today. So I just did.

Introducing Seperation Anxiety

Ava has always been a bit of a Mama's girl. I mean, I stay home with her so she should be. Today, she did not like it unless we were in the same room. TOUCHING. This makes eking out my semi lame existence very challenging with a 25 pound extra weight.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Remote Comparison

Taken December 25, 2007. Ava kicked Daddy in the nuts right after this was taken.




Taken November 20, 2007





October 16, 2007


September 16, 2007



August 9, 2007


July 18, 2007


June 8, 2007


April 17


March 15

The Christmas Siege Day Three


Ava in her chair waiting for the gifts to be opened.


Ava wearing crazy reindeer antlers


Laverne got into the act.


Ava and Laverne bonding.


Ava opening a gift.


She did like that bag.


Ava passed out after the first batch of present opening.


We deep fried a turkey.


Here Ava is opening the second batch of gifts.


Some boxes were bigger than others. This is her Tiffany box.

Christmas is like a siege. A siege of gifts. You go to South Carolina and exchange gifts. You go to Duluth and exchange gifts. Finally you go to the Grandparents and exhange gifts.

One thing that is bothering me from the visit to yohboh's extended family is the fact the thirty three year old grandmother fed the four month old a chocolate cupcake with green frosting. Just the amount of corn syrup and artificial coloring still makes me shudder.

Merry Christmas

For Christmas, I give you the Smurf Christmas Special.




Smurfette is a HO.

Ava had another Christmas

Ava got a lot of toys.


B. giving Ava love.


DBW gets a tray.


Ava with one of her many toys.


Hondu and Ava


DBW and Ava


Wearing the outfit great grandma gave her.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

I took some really great pictures of the baby though


Where are we going?


Are we there yet?


It was so boring I fell asleep.


Daddy makes his special stop.


Why aren't we there yet?


THIS IS SO LAME!


I fall asleep.


That is one little baby.


Sunlight.


Daddy and Ava walking.


Tiny!


Love her face, so direct.


Ava was looking at this pit bull take a huge dump.


Ava's first experience with Starbucks.


MMMM. Starbucks.